Full Question- How do I stop saying hurtful things to my partner?I’m really tired of arguing over the littlest things and I am the one starting them.
You could be jealous, possessive and insecure. You may be seeking attention.
You are definitely driving your partner away.
Chill! Why are you with a person with whom you have to argue all the time? Don’t tell me this is love. If it was, you would not have wanted to ruin the peace of mind for them as well as for yourself.
You are just self-sabotaging and tomorrow, when things end, you will realize that you were both the oppressor and the victim.
What are you afraid of? Rejection?
Do you think that saying hurtful things to your partner will show how much they love you? Maybe you think that if they stay even after listening to all the BS you are giving them, they probably love you. You are strengthening your insecurity. Nothing will ever be enough for you.
So I suggest this- be a whole person. You are empty. Empty vessels make noise. Be secure. Let yourself know that you are enough. Love yourself enough. Be kind to yourself. Be kind to the person who is bearing all this for you. They love you but the more you hurt them, the more of a monster you will become. Eventually, they will give up on you. Don’t go to a corner crying about how much you loved someone and how much you were trying to strangle them with your love and how they were foolish enough to LEAVE.
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It is very easy for us to hurt our partner. They are the closest people to us, sharing our life. If we are sad or depressed, they will be the first people affected from our behavior. Maybe you can erupt like a volcano once in a while and have a fight. Your partner will forgive that. But arguing every day over the smallest of things is so not done. Come on, we can do better for the people we love.