How do I react to a friend who gets angry when he loses? Quora Answers

Neha Joy Chauhan competitive

Additional info-

Context: In a game of badminton, whether I win or lose, I say good game to the opposing player and move on.

However, when I’m playing with a friend, he gets very angry when he loses and says he hates playing with me – but for some reason, he’s fine afterwards.

How should I react to this?

Answer-

This friend is overly-competitive. Give him a tough fight. Don’t even think about letting them win without a fight even once. Maybe promise them a small reward if they win. They will be excited and charged up. Maybe they defeat you once. They will be happy for the rest of their life just because they defeated you once. Do it only if you are not going to be annoyed by their constant rants about how they defeated you one fine day. 🙂

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Some people are very competitive by nature. You cannot help. These people may or may not be wishing any harm upon you. All they want is to win. Some people are also attention seekers. They believe that throwing a tantrum when they lose could help them get more attention. Now consider a scenario where one friend loses and the other wins. The winner will obviously be getting more attention and praise. The loser might get consolation. An attention seeking person is not happy with mere consolation. They want all eyes on themselves. Sometimes, they may throw a tantrum to ensure that the spotlight turns away from the winner. They hog attention, the limelight, get consolation and people often feel so bad for them, that they get treats and gifts (or anything else).

Now, talking about competitive people. See, there is nothing inherently wrong about being competitive. Everyone likes to win. However, the people who have a competitive streak like to win after a tough fight. They like the fact that they overcame a challenge. Don’t give them a tough fight and their competitiveness is gone in minutes. You may feel proud that a person feels like he needs to compete with you. That way, you are being put at a higher pedestal. However, make sure that you don’t give yourself too much air. Let the competitive person strive as hard as they can. When they win, the victory will be sweeter.

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